Dear Momma coming home from hospital,
You got this. That percoset fueled glaze from your C-Section and 18 hour labor will soon be replaced with a lack of sleep. You'll savor getting four hours of sleep in a row like someone without kids enjoys sleeping in. Keep chocolate around. It'll be a great reward for getting up in the middle of the night to try and breastfeed. Have everyone who is not related to you over at once. This is why god created sip and sees. You do not want people visiting unless they will do chores while you breastfeed from the comfort of your couch (thanks family!).
I know feeding the baby was tough in the hospital. Impossible actually. But breastfeeding will get easier. And if it doesn't, formula is your friend! Remember how the baby wouldn't eat right away, so you spent every two hours shoving a breast in her mouth begging her to at least try? So many tears, so much pain! And when all else failed, we visited lactation consultants, an ENT for a tongue tie clip, and used a nipple shield for 5 months? As the pediatric hospitalist said, he'd seen premie babies on feeding tubes EBFing at 4 months. All is not lost if breastfeeding goes poorly to start. Oh also, nipple confusion is so overstated.
Soon the baby will get the hang of feeding, but just as she does, it'll feel like she needs to do it ALL THE TIME. And you can't leave the house. Then the nursing sessions will turn into cuddling and naptime, and you'll get used to sitting on the couch and watching netflix. Soon you'll look forward to that downtime, and her napping on you. Soon you will miss it.
Then you'll try to venture out more, especially because she only naps on you. To give yourself a break, you let her nap in the car, driving around for over an hour, stopping at McDonald's for lunch. You make plans around her naptime, planning to go to lunch while she sleeps through it. You'll go to Nordstrom's Cafe because it is right next to the women's lounge, and ask yourself why doesn't EVERY store have that kind of facility?
She'll melt down in public. She will get too tired, or be too hungry. You'll miss the cues trying to live a normal life and wind up pushing a screaming baby through the mall. You'll head home in time for her last nap and try to get her to take a long one so she isn't over tired for bed time. And you'll watch netflix, and enjoy a guinness.
She will sleep at night sometimes. She'll definitely eat. She will be swaddled in your room. She'll need all her things - those dreaded "sleep assocations". The shusher. The swaddle. The sent from heaven white noise machine. You'll put garbage bags up over your windows months too late, realizing complete darkness really helps with her sleeping.
The arguing with your spouse about what to do with the baby - that will mellow. Both of you will get more sleep, more confidence, and become more rational. Your partner will push you to give the baby more independence. And even though you spend the most time with the baby and obviously momma knows best - sometimes you need that perspective. Listen to him.
Then it'll be time to make transitions, mostly at the urging of your partner. Put her in the crib. Remove the swaddle. She will handle it better than you. The angelcare monitor will make it easier to live with her stomach sleeping. But you'll put it away soon enough.
Everyday she will start to look older. Her limbs getting longer, belly getting bigger. That head! Those fingernails! She will learn to give baby kisses.
And she'll start rolling. She'll do it for a few weeks and stop. Relish that time. Because then all she'll be able to do is roll one way. You'll have to flip her before she fusses. That won't last either. She'll move soon enough and then everything will become an obstacle in the path of babyzilla. Watch the cords on the floor! Stones from our shoes! Errant change that fell from pockets soon become a choking hazard. You'll buy every baby proofing item known to woman.
Soon you'll be filling out her daycare paperwork crying, knowing that again, she'll handle it better than you.
Then she will grow hair! It'll be crusted with cradle cap. That will gross you out. But then someone in public will say its the exact same shade as yours, and you won't notice it anymore. So you'll gingerly pick it off her scalp and vow to give her more showers and baths. But because she hates the bathtub, the water, not being in your arms - you will resort to and learn to love showers.
Soon you'll go to mommy and baby yoga, storytime, movies and start to be proud. The baby is rolling, and crawling, and cooing and talking. She puts on a show. She eats solids like a champ! She sleeps alone! She is so muscular! You'll think about we instead of she. Maybe we are good parents. Maybe I'm a good mother.
She will play with toys and you'll start to think about brain development. You'll realize you may be a teacher but you know nothing about stimulating a baby for 12+ hours a day everyday. A friend will mention the double edged sword of daycare - you feel bad sending her, you feel bad for not sending her - and you realize you will be ready for her to go. Even if it causes some tears.
You'll blink and the first six months will be behind you. That little baby that didn't want to come out so badly they had to go in and take her out - she will love the world, and you won't be able to remember yours without her in it. Her laugh will be the best thing you've ever heard. You'll want to pocket it and keep it with you for all of the hard times.
She will still wake early and be so needy. And she'll hate baths. But she will be a crib sleeping solid eating machine soon enough. So new mommy self, remember - it gets better.
Love,
The momma of a six and a half month old
You got this. That percoset fueled glaze from your C-Section and 18 hour labor will soon be replaced with a lack of sleep. You'll savor getting four hours of sleep in a row like someone without kids enjoys sleeping in. Keep chocolate around. It'll be a great reward for getting up in the middle of the night to try and breastfeed. Have everyone who is not related to you over at once. This is why god created sip and sees. You do not want people visiting unless they will do chores while you breastfeed from the comfort of your couch (thanks family!).
I know feeding the baby was tough in the hospital. Impossible actually. But breastfeeding will get easier. And if it doesn't, formula is your friend! Remember how the baby wouldn't eat right away, so you spent every two hours shoving a breast in her mouth begging her to at least try? So many tears, so much pain! And when all else failed, we visited lactation consultants, an ENT for a tongue tie clip, and used a nipple shield for 5 months? As the pediatric hospitalist said, he'd seen premie babies on feeding tubes EBFing at 4 months. All is not lost if breastfeeding goes poorly to start. Oh also, nipple confusion is so overstated.
Soon the baby will get the hang of feeding, but just as she does, it'll feel like she needs to do it ALL THE TIME. And you can't leave the house. Then the nursing sessions will turn into cuddling and naptime, and you'll get used to sitting on the couch and watching netflix. Soon you'll look forward to that downtime, and her napping on you. Soon you will miss it.
Then you'll try to venture out more, especially because she only naps on you. To give yourself a break, you let her nap in the car, driving around for over an hour, stopping at McDonald's for lunch. You make plans around her naptime, planning to go to lunch while she sleeps through it. You'll go to Nordstrom's Cafe because it is right next to the women's lounge, and ask yourself why doesn't EVERY store have that kind of facility?
She'll melt down in public. She will get too tired, or be too hungry. You'll miss the cues trying to live a normal life and wind up pushing a screaming baby through the mall. You'll head home in time for her last nap and try to get her to take a long one so she isn't over tired for bed time. And you'll watch netflix, and enjoy a guinness.
She will sleep at night sometimes. She'll definitely eat. She will be swaddled in your room. She'll need all her things - those dreaded "sleep assocations". The shusher. The swaddle. The sent from heaven white noise machine. You'll put garbage bags up over your windows months too late, realizing complete darkness really helps with her sleeping.
The arguing with your spouse about what to do with the baby - that will mellow. Both of you will get more sleep, more confidence, and become more rational. Your partner will push you to give the baby more independence. And even though you spend the most time with the baby and obviously momma knows best - sometimes you need that perspective. Listen to him.
Then it'll be time to make transitions, mostly at the urging of your partner. Put her in the crib. Remove the swaddle. She will handle it better than you. The angelcare monitor will make it easier to live with her stomach sleeping. But you'll put it away soon enough.
Everyday she will start to look older. Her limbs getting longer, belly getting bigger. That head! Those fingernails! She will learn to give baby kisses.
And she'll start rolling. She'll do it for a few weeks and stop. Relish that time. Because then all she'll be able to do is roll one way. You'll have to flip her before she fusses. That won't last either. She'll move soon enough and then everything will become an obstacle in the path of babyzilla. Watch the cords on the floor! Stones from our shoes! Errant change that fell from pockets soon become a choking hazard. You'll buy every baby proofing item known to woman.
Soon you'll be filling out her daycare paperwork crying, knowing that again, she'll handle it better than you.
Then she will grow hair! It'll be crusted with cradle cap. That will gross you out. But then someone in public will say its the exact same shade as yours, and you won't notice it anymore. So you'll gingerly pick it off her scalp and vow to give her more showers and baths. But because she hates the bathtub, the water, not being in your arms - you will resort to and learn to love showers.
Soon you'll go to mommy and baby yoga, storytime, movies and start to be proud. The baby is rolling, and crawling, and cooing and talking. She puts on a show. She eats solids like a champ! She sleeps alone! She is so muscular! You'll think about we instead of she. Maybe we are good parents. Maybe I'm a good mother.
She will play with toys and you'll start to think about brain development. You'll realize you may be a teacher but you know nothing about stimulating a baby for 12+ hours a day everyday. A friend will mention the double edged sword of daycare - you feel bad sending her, you feel bad for not sending her - and you realize you will be ready for her to go. Even if it causes some tears.
You'll blink and the first six months will be behind you. That little baby that didn't want to come out so badly they had to go in and take her out - she will love the world, and you won't be able to remember yours without her in it. Her laugh will be the best thing you've ever heard. You'll want to pocket it and keep it with you for all of the hard times.
She will still wake early and be so needy. And she'll hate baths. But she will be a crib sleeping solid eating machine soon enough. So new mommy self, remember - it gets better.
Love,
The momma of a six and a half month old
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